Dear Pals,
I was wondering if we human beings would ever be able to reconcile the deeply embedded and often conflictive beliefs of the world's competing religions?
After all, the world is full of conflicting beliefs, dogmas and traditions that were created over long periods of time very often in isolated parts of the world.
I was thinking about the daily conflicts that these "old time" religious indoctrinations are causing today, not the least of which were the murders of 13 Americans and the wounding of 42 others at Ft. Hood by a devoutly religious U.S. Army Major of the Moslem persuasion.
There is an old saying that, "More people have been killed in the name of God than for any other reason."
How do you stop the killing in God's name? Well, here's an out-of-the-box idea for you to chew on.
Many religious beliefs have been held for centuries and religious doctrines have been deeply and emotionally embedded in people beginning shortly after birth.
In all fairness, the beliefs of some religions and the concept of "sin" has also evolved or devolved (depending on your point-of-view) over time.
Still other religions have not changed at all. Apparently, those "religions" got it right, right from the start.
For example, I was born a Catholic. When I was a boy, eating meat on Friday was a sin...I can't recall if it was a mortal or venial sin...but, I'm sure it was a pretty serious sin, but not as bad as LUST, which was my personal favorite.
Today, I wonder if I'm going to Hell for eating meat on Friday, missing Mass on Sunday and Holy Days, for chasing skirts with lusty glee in my mis-spent youth or for being divorced and excommunicated?
Then when I get to Hell, I wonder if I'll share a red-hot shovel shift with Hitler, Stalin, Mao and Jack the Ripper, or if I'll be in the perfumed and air-conditioned part of Hell with Gypsy Rose Lee, Marylin Monroe, Mae and Evelyn West, Madame Pomadour and Casanova, George Carlin, Lewis Black, Capt. Ron and Jack Ortbal.
Thinking about all this religion-inspired Hellishness set my mind all awhirl in a cachphony of theological and philosophical dissonance.
Then I had a blinding flash of inspiration!
SHAZAAM! SHAMWOW!
Science has evolved.
Technology has evolved.
Medicine has evolved.
Transportation has evolved.
Mankind's knowledge has evolved in so many ways.
Even Birk has evolved. In a an uncharacteristic fit of self-aggrandizement, I titled my blog photo: The Evolution Of Man Is Complete. (I'm the evolved one on the right).
Is that a banana in my pocket? Or am I just glad to see you? (Actually, it's a 1/2 roll of TUMS)
Look Amigos...the superstitions of eons of lost past millenia and The Dark Ages are in our rearview mirror in virtually every category and area of human endeavor...except religion.
Things that man once accepted as facts and immutable natural laws from religious authorites speaking for God, have been disproved as mankind's intellectual capability, scientific knowledge and the liberty and freedom to think for oneself has advanced.
For example, we don't believe that the Sun revolves around the earth any more.
We don't believe that the earth is flat any more.
We don't believe that man cannot fly.
We don't believe that witches cause plague.
We don't believe that women need to be isolated in the "red tent."
We don't believe that leeches and bleeding makes people better.
We know about atoms, muons, photons, leptons and quarks.
Man has been to the Moon and back.
We have indoor plumbing, heat and air conditioning.
We can make steam power flow through pipes.
We know how to transplant hearts, kidneys and lungs.
We can perform pre-natal surgery in the womb.
We can clone sheep.
We can even make a McRib!
It begs the question.
Why haven't the world's religions evolved??
Especially in the Age of the Internet when we are so interconected and have instant access to so much information and knowledge.
Why should religious beliefs remain stuck in ancient paradigms???
Why do people today persist in believing religious dogmas that simply defy the laws of science and common sense and the principles of basic human decency?
So I thought, "Why not revist all of the religious assumptions, traditions and dogmas of Islam, Mayan, Aztec, Olmec, Judaism, Sumerian, Catholic, Lutheran, Episcoplaian, Baptist, Methodist, Buddhism, Shintoism, Zoroastrianism, Hinduism, Unitarian, Dogon, Zulu and Taoist??"
Let's see which religious dogmas stand up to the bright light of intellectual scrutiny from the perspectives of TRUTH, LIFE, SCIENCE, COMMON SENSE and HUMAN ETHICS."
Let's put all religious ideas to the test.
STEP ONE: Let's put all the core religious ideas up on the Internet and have 100 people from each country, selected at random, vote on them. IN or OUT
HERE'S JUST A FEW SAMPLES:
1. Sacrifice a human being and offer his still beating heart to God to make it rain. IN or OUT
2. Thou shalt not steal. IN or OUT
3. Honor thy Father and Mother. IN or OUT
4. Honor Kill family members who disavow your religion's rules and customs. IN or OUT
5. Same sex marriage. IN or OUT
6. Inter-species marriage. IN or OUT
7. Perform female circumsicions. IN or OUT
8. Keep women from driving, voting and going to school. IN or OUT
9. Killing people of different religions who refuse to join yours. IN or OUT
10. Rape. IN or OUT
11. Drinking Alcohol. IN or OUT
12. Using heroin, cocaine, LSD, crystal meth, et cetera. IN or OUT
13. Mandatory Church on Sunday. IN or OUT
14. Mandatory Church on Saturday. IN or OUT
15. Mandatory Church on Friday. IN or OUT
16. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor's wife. IN or OUT
17. Thou shalt not commit adultery. IN or OUT
18. Eating pork (McRib). IN or OUT
19. Beheadings and Amputations as penalties for bad behavior. IN or OUT
20. Simultaneously Marry Multiple Wives. IN or OUT
21. Simultaneously Marry Multiple Husbands. IN or OUT
22. Love Thy Neighbor IN or OUT
23. Thou Shalt Not Bear False Witness IN or OUT
25. Eat Beef. IN or OUT
26. Fly through the air. IN or OUT
27. Irish in charge. IN or OUT
28. Euthanasia at 85. IN or OUT
29. Circumsize boys. IN or OUT
30. Arrange your daughter's marriage to a stranger. IN or OUT
31. Hide the female body in a head-to-toe sack? IN or OUT
32. Enjoy Rodin's Hand of God sculpture. IN or OUT
33. Hell. IN or Out
34. Nirvana. IN or Out
35. Women's rights. IN or OUT
36. Dancing. IN or OUT
37. Snake handling. IN or OUT
38. Going on a walkabout. IN or OUT
39. Abortion. IN or OUT
40. Tithing. IN or OUT
ESSAY QUESTION: Is man a part of God or apart from God?
You see how this global human intake process can work!
STEP TWO: We make a comprehensive list of all the core beliefs of every major religion - past and present - and then have the randomly-selected 100 people from each country in the world vote on which beliefs are IN and which are OUT.
This would get representative input from all the peoples of the Earth. A big representative intake session. Very inclusive, culturally diverse and quite open.
STEP THREE: I would personally take the intake results up to my brother-in-law's very cool log cabin in the northwoods of Michigan. I prefer this cool woodsy location to the barren, scorching blazing-ass hot desert near Las Vegas. Deserts have been known to bake turds as hard as rocks.
There in total meditative seclusion, I would ask the One True God to tell me which things stay IN and which are OUT.
As soon as the One True God gives me the edited and approved IN or OUT list...I'll bring it back and share it with the rest of the world. There is a precedent for this kind of direct revelation in the Judeo, Christian and Islamic traditions.
Then, The New Really Cool Religious Rules For You publishing company will provide a copy to everyone on Earth for just $1.00 and then everyone can follow these updated religious rules.
I'll only keep 10%. The rest I will donate to The Limbaugh Institute For Advanced Conservative Studies. (Just kidding.) I'll give the rest of the dough-re-mi to the world's 50 top Medical Schools.
Religious belief conflict problems solved.
STEP FOUR: I will retire to Bermuda to begin my new career as a bikini-fitter and sun tan lotion applier.
Birk, Commonsensetarian and Citizen of the Republic, a Mob Of One
PS: Do I believe in God? You bet, the evidence of God's creativity is all around, above, below and throughout everything. The wonders of God's universe and nature play out before us everyday. But, my "Creator of all things seen and unseen" might be different than your personal vision of God.
If it is true that God created man in his own image and likeness, we all must have God-DNA. And if we all have God-DNA then the nature of God must be innately in all of us. We must be God-wired in the double helix of our own DNA.
So why do we need some "outside self-proclaimed God expert" to tell us what God's will for us is.
Well, could it be because there is a lot of profit in the religious prophet business?
Hmmmm...
All kidding aside, if you really want to get an insight into my personal All Is ONE - God-in-Man beliefs and supporting data visit www.capstonepyramid.com
It's kind of a Gnostic view that God-Is-Within-Man.
You don't have to look out for or look up to find God...all you have to do is look within.
The Greeks called this en theos or God within - the word enthusiasm came from that expression. People who were turned on by creativity, innovation, learning and had a real love for life were said to "have God within."
Are you an enthusiast?
What are you enthusiastic about?
Do you believe in God?
And, does God believe in you?
THREE FINAL PERPLEXING QUESTIONS:
1) Before Charleton Heston was given The 10 Commandments by the One True God, after the Jews fled the oppression of Yul,The Great Pharoah of Egypt...what had been God's rules of conduct for mankind for the previous 5000 to 10,000 to 250,000 years?
We're we all just ad-libbing our way through every day?
2) And, how come God waited so long to give Moses just 10 simple commandments to live by?
3) Why was God so darn brief??
Maybe The 10 Commandments were just the OUTLINE that would have to be constantly conditionally-clarified by lawyers, courts, kings, emporers, prophets, religious clerics and Democrat politicians over the ensuing centuries??
I wonder about things like this...do you?
BONUS QUESTIONS:
Should stew be served in a bowl or on a plate?
Should toilet paper be A) pulled over the top of the roll or B) pulled down from behind the roll?
Mike P. needs to know these answers. Especially about the stew serving issue: bowl vs. plate.
